Tell me if you’ve heard this before about the path to success, “If it was easy then everyone would be doing it”? Generally speaking, many of us start off on the right path in life but for some reason, we veer off the path and can’t quite seem to stay on the path to success. I believe it’s due to the lack of setting boundaries.

There’s a story of a broad/wide road and a narrow way. The broad and wide road leads to destruction, leads to failure, and so many people are on this road because it’s the easy route.

Then there are only a select few people who decides to take the narrow way that leads to life, that leads to success. This road is more difficult. The key difference between the broad road and the narrow way are boundaries.

Staying on the narrow way won’t be easy but it will be worth it.
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On your way to work or whenever you’re traveling, you’ve probably noticed those iron and wooden railings on the side of the road. Guardrails are a system designed to keep you from straying into dangerous or off-limit areas. I would like for you to look at boundaries as your internal guardrails.

On the path to success, it is important that you establish your own mental guardrails which should serve as warning signs to keep you from getting into those dangerous or off-limit areas that lead to failure and not, success.

In the best-selling book “Boundaries“, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend states that boundaries are personal property lines that define who you are and who you are not, and influence all areas of your life.

I want to push you to create your own mental guardrails to help you establish behaviors and principles to protect you from unnecessary long-term physical, emotional, financial or professional pain or setbacks in the future.

2 Reasons to Set Boundaries

1. Protection

Guard Your Heart

Sometimes we like to flirt with danger, getting as close to the line as possible. It’s important that we take the advice of a Hebrew proverb that says, “guard your heart with all diligence.” (Pro 4:23) Your heart is your will, emotions, feelings and your mind. What are you letting in? What are you releasing out?

Maybe you have had the unfortunate experience of crashing into a guardrail on the road. Yes, it probably left some damage and you probably had some temporary pain, but just imagine if that guardrail wasn’t there and you veered off a cliff or into a canal.

That’s the importance of having these mental guardrails, it’s for your protection. It protects your heart.

It’s important to understand that boundaries are not walls. Think of them as fences because fences have gates. Boundaries help you keep the good in and the bad out. Let’s face it, you’ve made mistakes, had failures, and you’re probably holding in a lot of bad emotions and experiences.

Open the gates and let the bad out and let the good in as you stay laser focused on that narrow way to success.

There’s protection when you set boundaries in your life.
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2. Direction

Burdens & Loads

Our second point is direction, dealing with others within boundaries. We are responsible to others and for ourselves. The Apostle Paul once said that we are to carry, share, and support each other’s burdens (Gal 6:2). He also said that each one should carry their own load (Gal 6:5).

There’s a big difference between burdens and loads. The Greek word for burden means excessive or overloaded burden. Think of a boulder, there’s no way we should be carrying a boulder each day.

For example, a burden could be a tragedy, crisis, or maybe a major loss in your life or someone else life. You should be helping or having someone else help you carry that burden. On the flip side, the Greek word for “load” is a daily responsibility. Picture a backpack.

Obviously, it’s easier to carry a backpack every day versus a boulder. Setting boundaries always require that you take responsibility for your own backpack, your own actions, thoughts, and behaviors.

Support Network

When creating your boundaries it’s important to always have a support network to help you with your boulders/burdens, or to help others with their burdens. Setting and maintaining boundaries is hard work, not overwork.

It’s extremely important that you have a work-life balance because overworking on your daily load can lead to burnout, and burnout is just a one-way ticket to that broad road to failure.

We can’t trust ourselves to know when our boundaries are being violated. -Melody Beattie

Also, you have to put some teeth behind your guardrails, you have to backup your boundaries with consequences for yourself as well as others who step out of bounds. You have to learn how to say “no” when other people try to pass their loads on you; freeloaders.

Setting boundaries mean saying no to freeloaders.
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You can’t be all things to all people. It takes discipline, self-control and wisdom to know what you should and shouldn’t be doing. You can’t carry everybody’s load and you shouldn’t carry your burdens alone.

As a reminder, it’s extremely important that you establish these guardrails to keep you from straying into those dangerous and off limit areas, to stay on that narrow way to success. I can’t promise that it’s going to be easy. It’s going to take hard work, but it will be worth it.

Do you struggle with setting boundaries, if so which area in your life is the hardest? Please comment below.

The post HOW TO AVOID SETBACKS BY SETTING BOUNDARIES FOR SUCCESS appeared first on Steve Messam.

Why is it so difficult for us to think less of ourselves and more of others? When we neglect the importance of serving and helping others we hurt our ability to reach new heights. Do you want to rise to great heights? Then you must lay first a foundation of humility.

Think of humility as just having a proper view of one’s own importance. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s just thinking of yourself less.

Then you have its opposite, which is pride. Pride is having an excessive or an exaggerated view of one’s own importance.

This actually gives us two categories, which we will call your blockers versus your builders. When you think of your blockers, they are the prideful people. They actually prevent others from getting around them and pretty much focus on their own interests.

Then you have those who are humble and they are your builders, they actually assist others in reaching their potential. They focus on the interests of others as well as themselves, which creates a win-win situation not just for your success but also for the success of those around you.

True humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s just thinking of yourself less. -C.S. Lewis
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2 Building Blocks of Humility

If you truly want to rise to great heights then you will have to incorporate these two building blocks of humility.

1. Build a Foundation

Humility is the foundation of success.

It’s easier to stand on solid rock than it is on sinking sand. When you’re building a house you don’t start with the roof, you start with the foundation. The foundation actually holds up and lifts up all the other parts.

Pride actually causes a house to fall down, because it’s only worried about the roof, it’s worried about the top. Pride goes before destruction. Jesus once said that whoever makes himself great (toots their own horn) will be humbled and knocked down, and whoever humbles themselves will actually be made great (Matt 23:12).

Make humility the foundation to your success by lifting up people and in return, God will lift you up.

Make humility the foundation to your success by lifting up people, then God will lift you up.
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Humility builds. Pride blocks.

Jack Welch, the former CEO of General Electric, once said that “before becoming a leader, success was all about growing yourself.” That’s pride, that’s when you don’t want someone else to get the promotion, or you don’t want to see someone else in the limelight.

He went on to say that “after becoming a leader, success is all about growing others.” That’s humility. That’s when you begin to build a strong foundation of humility. Where you’re focusing on growing your teammates, your coworkers, your family members. It’s a win-win when they grow…you grow.

Blockers criticize. Builders praise and celebrate others. Pride causes your ego to write checks that your character can’t cash. It’s like building your house on sand; when the rain, wind, and flood comes, it will fall. Invest in humility so when those floods come you and those who you are lifting up will be standing on solid rock.

Pride causes your ego to write checks that your character can’t cash.
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2. Build a Bridge.

Our second building block is to build a bridge. It’s easier to cross a bridge than it is to climb a wall. After living outside of New York City for a couple of years, I know that it’s a lot easier to cross the George Washington Bridge than it is to climb Mount Everest.

Pride builds walls between people, but humility builds bridges. Blockers use walls to prevent others from getting around. I’m sure all of us have probably been guilty on occasion of being a wall that prevented others because we’re so focused on ourselves.

I want to challenge you to be a builder! Build bridges to assist others to reach their full potential.

Regardless your level of success, you are standing on the shoulders of those who has gone before you. You are walking across those bridges. Therefore, you must make sure that your foundation in humility is strong to carry others across as well.

Use your abilities and gifts to actually help your team, co-workers, family and others by being a bridge and not a wall.

Pride builds walls between people, but humility builds bridges.
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Humility unlocks greatness in you by putting others first. Blockers keep others from reaching their full potential. Forget about yourself long enough to lend a helping hand and unlock the greatness in others. We need each other.

Always remember that pride leads to a great fall, but a humble spirit gains honor. Do your part, all your acts of humility, whether it’s serving, helping, supporting others, wherever you are. It’s those acts of humility put together, that leads to results and helps us to change the world.

On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being exceptionally well. How would you rate your level of humility? Please comment below.

The post HOW TO BUILD SOCIAL HUMILITY FOR AMAZING RESULTS appeared first on Steve Messam.

I’m sure you can agree with me that each and every week before you start your work or your school day one of the toughest and probably most important decisions you have to make is, “What am I going to wear?” Your image.

Your appearance, how you look and how you feel plays a big role on how your day turns out. Although your outward appearance is important, I want to challenge you to focus more on your inward image versus your outward image.

Before we jump into the three ways to focus more on your inward image vs your outward image, let’s consider these definitions of “image” first. The first one being appearance. Think of that as how you are described, or your outward image. Then we have character. Think of that as how you can be defined, or your inward image.

As a leader, you should focus more on your character (inward), before worrying about your appearance (outward). When a leader wakes up in the morning, their focus should be on their attitude before attire.

When a leader wakes up in the morning, their focus should be on their attitude before attire.
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I’m going to challenge you to create a “tailor-made” image from the inside out because it’s going to be a key factor in you impacting and influencing others and you achieving your goals.

3 Ways to Focus on Inward Image

I can think of at least three “tailor-made” ways to improve your inward image and grow as a leader.

1. Alter It. This begins with attitude before attire. Before you decide what shoes, shirt, pants, blouse,  or skirt to wear, you need to decide what type of attitude you’re going to be wearing today. Are you going to be wearing a good attitude or a bad attitude? A humble attitude or an arrogant attitude? You must decide what type of attitude you’re going to wear today first before you decide your attire.

Your image, your attitude, can either help or hinder your ability to impact and influence others as a leader. In order for you to alter your character, you must alter your attitude. Having the right attitude does your character good.

Having the right attitude gives your character a strong foundation to stand. In leadership, character counts. Your character is so important that it’s what God uses to truly look at you, unlike man who focuses on the outward appearance (1 Samuel 16:7).

JP Morgan, one of America’s great bankers once said, “A man’s best collateral is his character.” Character counts and you can take that to the bank.

A man’s best collateral is his character. -JP Morgan
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2. Brand It. You are the total package inside out and your brand, your name, is your legacy as a leader. The wisest man to ever live on earth, King Solomon, once stated that “a good name is better than precious ointment and should be chosen over great riches.” (Proverbs 22:1)

As a student athlete, I took great pride in the name that was on the front of my jersey, Central Michigan Chippewas – “Fire Up Chips!” – and the name on the back of my jersey, Messam. I bought into the values, beliefs, coaching, and all of the things tied up in that brand, Chippewas, and my name, Messam.

As a leader always remember that your name is your brand. What do you stand for? Who do you stand for? Your beliefs, your values?

How you carry yourself – your attire, your demeanor, your manners, or your appearance – and how you conduct yourself – your actions, your attitude, your behavior, or your character – together that’s the total package, that’s your brand, that’s your name.

Your legacy will far outlive your appearance. Leaders like Martin Luther King and Mother Teresa were great proponents of not judging the appearances of others, the skin color and all of those things, they put more value into the content of folks’ character. A leader’s character is very difficult to build up and it’s very easy to tear down.

Character is very difficult to build up and it’s very easy to tear down.
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3. Check It. You’re probably asking yourself, “How in the world do I check my character? How do I see my inward image?” It’s easy for me to see my outer appearance, I can look in the mirror, I can even ask someone how I look.

Here’s how you check your character. If you check your actions, you check your character. People can’t see your heart or your inward image, but they can see what you do.

Another way is to ask someone. Ask someone how’s your attitude, have someone who you trust check you when you maybe stepping out of bounds with your attitude and actions. People may long forget what you said, even what you may have worn, but they will always remember how you made them feel.

If you check your actions, you check your character.
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Let’s make good character fashionable as leaders. Let’s put on love, humility, meekness, kindness, patience, and forgiveness. Let’s make all of those great qualities and characteristics fashionable. It will never go out of style.

What Type of Attitude Did You Decide to Wear Today? Let us know in the comments. 

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You, yes you are called to be a leader. You may be thinking, “I don’t have an official title or role”, “No way, you could be talking to me.” Wrong! I am talking to you and I am here to tell you that, Leadership isn’t a title, it’s a Lifestyle. A lifestyle is how you live not a position that you hold.

Leadership isn’t a title, it’s a Lifestyle.
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Many goals that you have for yourself will require leadership to accomplish. Leading of self and leading of others. In order for you to grow in leadership, it will require that your mindset on the topic must grow as well.

Starting with leading from who you are more than the position that you may or may not hold. Who you are is far more important than what you do. Which is why it is so critical that you develop…You.

Success as a leader requires a growth mindset. It demands approaching resistance as an opportunity rather than an obstacle. And it’s only when you stretch beyond what you thought was possible that you discover strength you never knew.

Leadership requires some serious stretching to go beyond our current reality into endless possibilities. The call of leadership isn’t one of comfort but of Sacrifice. It’s when things get uncomfortable when you must push harder, for your breakthrough is near.

The call of leadership isn’t one of comfort but of Sacrifice.
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Do you feel that you…

• Believe that with God, Anything is Possible.
• Succeed by Helping Others Succeed.
• Make a Difference Before You Make a Complaint.
• Lead by Example Regardless of Your Title.
• See Life as a Continuous Learning Experience.

I can visualize you shaking your head “YES” continuously while reading that list. You might have thought, “Steve, you could have stopped at the first bullet!” If you indeed answered yes to one or all of those points, then Wisdom Chasers is the right tribe for you!

Here’s How Wisdom Chasers Helps You Grow As a Leader & Maximize Your Influence

1. Wisdom Chasers is here to help you grow UPWARD

Spiritual Growth Leads to Leadership Growth

I believe that you were born with a specific call on your life to make a difference in this world. Before you were born, your creator had a plan for you. A plan so big that you can not accomplish it without him. You must have a higher calling, purpose, or faith that you rely on to help you fulfill your dreams.

Without growing spiritually, you are more likely to be lost, misguided and useless as a servant leader. The concept of being “Self-Made” is one of the biggest pitfalls for the next generational leader. When your EGO (edging God out) takes control, you run the risk of letting your pride hurt your influence with others.

Jeff Giesea, entrepreneur and executive coach believe, “that the best way to grow as a leader is to grow spiritually.” He believes that the more your grow spiritually, the better you can serve others. Leadership is a call to serve God and people.

Wisdom Chasers will provide content, resources, and encouragement to help you increase your influence and grow Upward as a leader.

Leadership is a call to serve God and people.
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2. Wisdom Chasers is here to help you grow INWARD

Personal Growth Leads to Leadership Growth

Contrary to popular belief, growth doesn’t happen overnight. Expecting to be an expert after reading one book on a topic is foolish. Growth happens over time. Personal (inward) growth is a lifelong process that requires you to invest in your development continuously.

It’s hard to lead others if you can’t lead yourself. Discipline, humility, integrity, character, wisdom and so many other qualities don’t develop themselves. You must be intentional in your own development in order to lead others.  If you can’t lead you, you can’t lead them.

Rick Warren, philanthropists and pastor stated, “The moment you stop learning you stop leading.” I have also heard that a leader is a reader. What are you doing to develop yourself on your personal time? Do you have a personal development plan?

Wisdom Chasers will provide courses, resources, and content to help you increase your influence and grow Inward as a leader.

If you can’t lead you, you can’t lead them.
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3. Wisdom Chasers is here to help you grow OUTWARD

 Relational Growth Leads to Leadership Growth

President Theodore Roosevelt once said, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Care more about helping people than impressing people. If you want to increase your influence with people increase your focus towards others.

Remember that leadership is a call to serve. As a leader, you succeed when you help others succeed. Moving people from where they are currently to where they desire to be, require relational skills; how you interact with others.

Your effectiveness as a leader rests heavily on how you relate to others. Expressing genuine and sincere care for others is a fast track to winning their hearts. You may have the know-how and experience to offer but if you don’t connect with their hearts, your smarts are irrelevant.

Wisdom Chasers will provide resources, content, and courses to help you increase your influence and grow Outward as a leader.

Show them your heart, before you show them your smart.
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You are most likely busy and overwhelmed with finding time for your leadership development. Let Wisdom Chasers help you with your development by joining the Wisdom Chasers tribe. We look forward to helping you grow and growing with you!

Action: Will you join the Wisdom Chasers Leadership Revolution? If yes, drop the comment “I’m in!” below and join the Mailing List to stay updated.

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